Prayer of Confession: “Gracious God, we confess that we crave what we don’t need. … Our neighbor has a newer car, newer clothes, a newer house. The church down the street has a bigger congregation. Iraq has oil, Indonesia has gold, the Congo has cotton. The grass is greener on the other side. Like Adam and Eve, we crave the fruit that is off limits. Forgive us, O God. Heal our hunger for things that will never satisfy by filling us anew with the bounty of your grace; through Jesus Christ our Savior. Amen.”
Question: “Do you tend to be content with what you have, or do you have interest in acquiring the latest thing?”
I have been struggling with the very first prompt for the Feb. 26 – March 3 week because “either/or” questions are impossible for me – there is always a complexity behind the question. If I HAD to choose one, it would be to identify as “a more content person”, but that implies a static situation when, in fact, the lives of people who are part of my very inclusive notion of “family” plus decisions, experiences and guidance over the years have created the person that I am now (and I certainly hope that I will continue to grow and change and challenge).
There are three major examples of decision making that might help illustrate how I have incorporated some basic values into my internal self. The first example took place more than sixty years ago when both my father and George’s father were offered exciting new opportunities that would have meant a step up the corporate ladder in terms of money and prestige, but each would have required a move from Connecticut. In both cases, each set of parents decided that the impact on the family from a major upheaval was not worth the enticement of a new job and life elsewhere. If either family had moved (one to Texas and the other to New York City), it is highly unlikely that George and I would have ever met and our now sixty years of growing together would not have been part of each of our life stories. We are grateful that our parents chose to look at the ramifications for all when they must have wrestled with their decisions.
After George and I were married, I enjoyed my work as a computer programmer (at the very beginning of the computer age) while George was in graduate school and then when we moved to the Boston area and George started his job at Polaroid. When our oldest daughter was born, I was able to chose to stay home with our children and did so for twelve very happy years, filled with volunteer activities and friendships. By the time our then youngest was in second grade, I began to work at Wellesley College, my alma mater, on a permanent part-time basis, which was perfect for me – the best of both worlds.
But then I was offered an exciting, more than full-time job that would have carried with it prestige and visibility. All of a sudden, my choice to work part-time and to not have a “real” career led me to question the decisions that I had made and to wrestle with the offer. George was supportive of me no matter what my decision was, but he pointed out that I would not be able to spend the time with the kids that I treasured or to continue with important volunteer activities. I have already written about this situation in an earlier Lenten book and the impact that the sermon that Gwen Purushotham preached helped me see what was truly important to me and to decline the offer. I never regretted this decision and am glad that I had to spent time wrestling with it.
My final example dates back to 2001 when Polaroid went under. George worked at Polaroid for his entire career and had many opportunities to grow and to lead in the various jobs that he held in the company. By then, our oldest three kids had finished college (a second mortgage on our house made that possible), but our youngest was in high school. I was working at Wellesley full time as the registrar, a great job. We met with a financial advisor to determine next steps for our family, and whether we could manage financially if George did not seek out another high pressure (but fulfilling) job. We made the choice to eliminate the pressure of seeking a new job and this opened up an amazing opportunity for George and for all of us.
One of the great gifts from this major change in our lives was that George was able to spend time with my aging parents and would go to Connecticut once a week to take them out to lunch. He could respond when Pastor Dick Harding called to see if he could help with Joe and Muriel Plonko when it became apparent that they could no longer stay in their home. George had known Joe from when both of them had worked at Polaroid and he and Joe developed a special relationship (one of his happiest memories is spending time with Joe as they sang old hymns together). And he was there for our wonderful family friend Ruby Jackson as she grew older and eventually moved from her home into Newbury Court. These were all precious experiences for our “family”.
So for me, being able to learn from the lives of others and to take time to make considered choices means that I know that I am fortunate that there are choices to be made and that I have a reservoir of examples to help guide me. Perhaps that means contentment.
-Ann Hamilton
Sudbury UMC Lenten Devotions 